Dileep Mouleesha

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Synergy


I, as a person am very edgy, impatient and restless. I need to engage myself constantly; otherwise I feel that my life is slipping away right in front of my eyes. Not doing anything tires me and over sleeping leaves me with a hangover. I need something that would keep me occupied at all levels; mind, body and soul.

Running long distances has been one of my addictions. My restless mind, edgy soul and impatient body finds some kind of solace when I am sweating it out on the road. Five minutes into the run my heart rate stabilizes and it seems as if I am taking a stroll around the city.

Since I enjoy running so much, I plan to run a marathon shortly. The training demands me to run at least 50 kilometer that is spread over an entire week. Since, I had skipped running an entire week, I planned to compensate it over the weekend. Friday evening, I did a very satisfying 20 kilometer run, the following evening I scampered a 10 kilometer recovery run. That left me with 20 more kilometers short of my schedule. I planned to sweat it out on Monday morning. The goal was to reach my workplace which is 20 kilometer away from home. I thought it would be a cakewalk as I had done several 30 kilometer runs.

I started the run on an overcast and chilly Monday at the crack of dawn. Less than 5 minutes into the run I could feel that my legs did not have the strength, my steps were shorter than they generally have been. I could not raise my knees high enough and was dragging my feet on the ground. I could feel that I was burning calories that I did not have. I wanted to run, I knew I could. But the very thought of abandoning the run was not something I was willing to accept.

So I thought I would complete the run. Running for another couple of minutes I started gasping for breath. I knew I was failing. Humiliated, I thought of giving myself reasons for my inability to run. I thought I would have abandoned the run if I had a cramp in my leg. But there were no cramps. I thought I would have abandoned the run if some one needed help. But there was no one around, let alone anyone needing help.

I carried on scuttling, thinking of the times when I had passed by the same place but with much greater vigor. I thought I would hitch a ride but I felt ashamed because my T-shirt read “Real Hashers Run ON”. If I abandoned the run it would be a disgrace to my club and my club’s T-shirt. The conflict between my mind and my soul became stronger and stronger. My body kept running along the set path. I would run faster when I thought I would complete the run. I would run slower when I thought of giving up.

I was so preoccupied judging the conflict raging in me that I did not realise I had reached office. YES! I had completed the run successfully. And believe it or not I had finished the run faster than my previous best time. All in all it was another satisfying run.

I would be lying if I said that this kind of a conflict had never happened before. I encounter such conflicts every time I run. This is why running has kept me hooked, because it engages my mind, body and soul.