Do we really get smarter as we grow older?
I forced myself not to write about what I am penning now. This has troubled me so much from a couple of days that I just can’t seem to stop myself anymore.
I have always heard that age gives maturity in thought, which helps you take rational and sensible decisions. There is this one incident that will prove every believer wrong.
A 27 year old mother of 5 was raped by her father-in-law. The village panchayat (a council of elders representing a village) and the maulvi (supposed to be a very learned man) took a decision that the lady’s marriage with her husband is annulled because of the bodily congress of her and her father-in-law. Now she is the wife of her father-in-law. And her husband is her son.
Well this is the wildest thing I have ever heard. Does this imply that her own kids are her grandkids? Or are her children and her husband now siblings?
This does not end here. The panchayat along with the maulvi go on and insist that if the father-in-law is arrested, the daughter-in-law too has to be arrested, because it takes two for such an act! What a bunch of idiots.
Though I had heard a song “Dhodavaru ella jaanara alla”(meaning: all elders are not smart) when I was a kid, I believed it was a fun song. But now these buffoons have proved to me wrong.
posted by mouleesha at
11:06 PM
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5 Comments:
thght provoking ..its good..
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Anonymous, at 11:41 PM
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hi sparky,
didnt know it was you all this while.
as for your piece, what do you say about a thing like this. you come up against a problem you think hold on there is a logical reason to all this, but you just cannot pigeon hole this into a social problem, a socio economic one, or for that matter a one of case - of a demented mind at work, believe theres a lot more of this that never sees the light of day, guess you have heard of the situation in Haryana where the mahabharath way of sharing a wife amongst a set of brothers is practiced, because the sex ratio there is so skewed, there are literally (beg our pardon for this) not enough women to go around, because they were all killed in their mothers wombs.
There are also some tribes, in chatisgarh that practice this, wonder what their case is,
is this something we detest, because we have always believed, what we have for so long and have never come up against something that challenges the very ethos of everything we thought we knew.
But then this guy in your piece, who in effect should be lynched in public is accomodated within the same society under the pretext of a marriage, hell how could these people even live under the same roof again mother- grandmother, father- grandfather, husband- son
and children - grandchildren yet all.
There is an attempt being made to make the women believe that this is her fate, her karma if you will to be used and abused and in effect accept this as perfectly normal everyday life.
The challenge then is to bring about a seachange in the psyche of the indian male, that women are not just objects of desire and lust but humans who deserve their rights and respect. I bring in the entire Indian male population, because, these perpetrators of crimes against women are fueled by an entire generation of neglect nd societal approval of the one upmanship (pun intended) of the male over the female.
our judicial system, though one of the best still leaves a lot to be desired, what with the Time for consideration, allowed to a rape victim, of the mairriage proposed by her rapist.
There is though a silver lining, a very thin one at that to this sad episode,there is some awareness generated when a women comes out and reports a crime and the media out of no heartfelt emotion or sympathy but driven by a crass pursual of TRP ratings sensationalises and in effect shocks the general public into seeing the demons sheltered within their society and provoke a reaction and an out pouring of feeling and an assimilation of like minded people that could in effect bring about a change or so i hope, at a terrible cost to the individual though.
I sign off where i started, knowing i have made no diference to the many victims but hoping this outpouring furthers the cause just that one step forward to an equanimous and just society, though i feel i have raised more questions than when i set out.
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Anonymous, at 2:32 AM
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The dog inside us reminds me of something! Whenever my son makes a mistake or misbehaves, he would promptly say, that act is because of his bad brain.
He classifies his brain into good and bad. Then we have to address his
issues w.r.t. good and bad brain.
Good and bad brain or dogs we feed!
I agree based on my experience.
regards
t.k.ramesh
Note: The verse of Tagore is really nice! Hope Monica recites or pronounces the sentence when we meet next time.
By
Anonymous, at 8:10 PM
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hi,
the news item mentioned by u is so unbelievable that i have no words even to condemn it! indeed ,who says age necessarily brings wisdom? no way ! i have personally met and interacted with some 'elders' who have defied logic in their behaviour.on the other hand, i have met youngsters who have wisdom far beyond their years.in fact , i have begun understanding that in fact till a child is about 20-21, he continues to carry all the basic
goodness that it is endowed with. it is later in life that he / she begins moving around in the adult world created by people who have already aged before it. and what does it find?
lies,corruption, ne-upmanship,deceit ..the list is exhaustive. it is then that gradually , he learns to adapt' ,which almost directly means...'if u can't beat them, join them...' sad, isn't it?
i can tell u this from personal experience that as i get on in years,i have to constantly shield myself from giving in to temptation to be 'bad'. being bad is far easier than being good, its results are faster. but we all also know, that being good ,pays in the end. and even if it doesn't pay in the way we want it to, we at least have the satisfaction of having a clean conscience.
and so...my dear friend, as ravindranath tagore said' jodi tor daak shone keyo naa aashe , taabe aikla cholo re....'( if no one heeds your call for a good cause, don't be afraid to walk ALONE).
lovely and reassuring, isn't it?
did u feel a little better? as venky had mentioned the other day, 'there
are 2 dogs inside us...the good one and the mean one. and the one we feed, wins...'
profound,isn't it?
think it over...
bye,
monica
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Anonymous, at 8:13 PM
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IMHO
wisdom is not related to the amount of white hair on ur head
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Anonymous, at 8:19 PM
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